How to appear confident. External signs of a confident person

You can see a real man a mile away. What makes him stand out is his demeanor, appearance, clothing, and speech. Using these factors, you can easily calculate how confident a man is.

Also, using these parameters, it is easy to identify representatives of the stronger sex who are not completely confident in their abilities.

This is important, because it is stupid for a man to look scared and shy. In order to make your appearance strict and confident, you need to know what a real male looks like.

The look of a confident male

- When a real man walks down the street, all the women turn to look at him. He is distinguished by his straight back and clear manner of walking. Most modern men do not pay due attention to their posture, but in vain. At first it may seem like hellish work, but in the future it will pay off. Even in old age, when everyone around you is stooped, you will look healthy and beautiful. Get into the habit of moving your shoulders back to show off your ribcage. With this pose you will show your confidence to the people around you.
- When you go forward, you need to look forward. Don't hide your gaze on the floor. When talking to another person, you need to look parallel to his head. Looking away to the side or down means that a person is not sure about something. A confident look will betray the masculinity of any guy.
- During unusual situations, most men begin to panic and fuss. The main features are not confident person This is twitching, active gestures, as well as shaking the leg. A nervous tic will not betray your confidence from the outside, so learn to control your emotions if you don’t want to look funny.
- Your handshake speaks volumes about your character. The stronger you shake your friend's hand, the better he will think of you. A steady hand means you have a strong character. Greet with confidence, but don’t overdo it, otherwise you might break your interlocutor’s fingers.
- Always improve your speech and diction. Clear and confident speech is an ace that every man should have up his sleeve. The inability to express one's thoughts clearly and clearly is a vice that needs to be eliminated immediately. You can see his character and confidence in a man’s voice.
- Pay attention to your clothes, neatness, and the smell that comes from you. You should always look attractive, well-groomed and courageous. You will be respected and appreciated for your clear and clear position.

How difficult and long a path do you need to walk in order to educate and grow it in yourself?

I wonder how faith in one’s own strength and trust in one’s own personality begins? Your opinion?

It turns out that confident behavior is the result of confident thinking. The way a person imagines himself is the way he looks. And he acts based on internal attitudes, ideas about himself.

How to become confident?

You can start with the simplest thing - portraying a confident person in any life situations. In the supermarket, in the pool, on the street, among colleagues, in the subway. The well-known law of the transition of quantity into qualitative changes will work here. You will show more, and with every action you will become more confident. Step, one more, next. And the process began! With every step it gets better, more natural, more persistent.

This is how you can outsmart your thinking, which is fixated on patterns. You can easily and unobtrusively change your mind, imagining yourself as an actor who selflessly and talentedly plays a role. You decide when to put the actor on stage, when to turn the “switch” to turn it off. You are in complete control of the situation. You decided that at the party you will be embarrassed - there will be strangers there, so act like that. Be shy okay! With all your might! Tired of it? Switch the “switch” - choose confident behavior, communicate as equals, with dignity and self-respect.

How to look confident?

One hundred percent in the history of your life there were moments when you were a confident person.

Remember them.

Perhaps - in childhood, when you helped your little sister fasten her sandals, or at school, when you recited a poem you had learned with pleasure. Or in my youth, when I won sports competitions.

Or in situations when you were among close and dear people, when you spoke in front of an audience or talked with some person.

Recall in your memory the intonations, how you spoke, how you breathed, how you moved, how you gestured, what position you were in? What did the voice sound like, what did the face express, what were the sensations?

Now, in order to “turn on” the confident person in you, repeat all this, copy your posture, pace and volume of speech, gestures - get into the desired state. There is no need to invent anything, you have already been in this place - in the body, you were such a person, now you remember it and make it your natural state.

When you are confident, others perceive your dignity, self-confidence, and self-respect. And they strengthen you even more in these sensations.

Space. A confident person inhabits the space well. Fully occupy the offered chair or armchair, lean back, use the armrests. Make broad gestures, on a grand scale, expanding the area of your influence. Be different from the insecure person, who, on the contrary, tends to shrink, shrink, take up as little space as possible, sit on the edge of the chair, and limits himself to meager gestures.
No fuss. Is there a standard for a confident person for you? Who is this? Margaret Thatcher? Angelina Jolie? Ivan Urgant? Sylvester Stallone? Or someone else? Imagine your ideal, who nervously jumps up in his chair, fidgets, intensely fiddles with his tie, and beats the drum with his fingers on the table. Yes, it's hard to imagine. Confidence is incompatible with vanity. Take it away.
Straight pose. In any position, standing or sitting, maintain an even posture. It allows you to radiate confidence, feel it and look like a confident person. Practice: chest forward, shoulders back, keep your head level in the horizontal and vertical plane. Imagine as if there is a string coming out of the top of your head that is pulling you into the heavens. Remember this pose and merge with it.
Rate of speech. When someone jabbers and speaks very quickly, it is difficult for him to be confident and independent. A confident person speaks with feeling, clearly, with emphasis, without tension. He knows that he will not be interrupted, he will be allowed to speak. Speech rate is average and smooth. Make it a rule that the more worried and nervous you are, the slower and calmer you speak, and pause. Speak as if you are communicating with a child and it is important for you that he understands you.
Me, me and me again. Speak in the first person. Use phrases: I think, I believe, I decided, I found out, I support, I disagree, I think differently. Feel free to express your opinion, do not hide behind the streamlined and impersonal “we”, “everyone”, “joint decision”, “everyone”. Avoid excuses!
Eye contact. A confident person shifts the focus from himself to others. He is not fixated on himself, he is interested in the interlocutor and the world. Therefore, a direct, open look is very important and helps to be confident and makes people understand your interest. When communicating, you connect not only your hearing, but also an additional channel of perception, “listen with your eyes”, perceive and understand your interlocutor more clearly.
Dignity. Take the example of the king of beasts, the lion. What plasticity, strength and power he has in his movements. Slowly, with dignity, confidently, elegantly. To be sure, slow down. Move like a king. Your movements should be smooth, meaningful, thoughtful, unhurried.
Acceptance of yourself and others. Be calm, friendly and kind, even if the other person does not agree with you or you with him. Believe in yourself, in your point of view. Yours will not make people think the same way as you. Your goal is to be respected.
Gesture of a confident man – spire-gesture. The fingertips of one hand touch the tips of the other hand at an acute angle, forming a spire. This is a signal of confidence and calm. Use it like additional method confident behavior.
Don't try to please everyone. You need to be good, first of all, for yourself. Your confidence should not depend on how, when and how you are assessed and accepted.
Pauses. Insecure people are afraid of silence, afraid of silence and are quick to break it. There is no need to “go out of your way” to fill every second with, albeit meaningless, chatter. Pause before you answer. Small. One to two seconds. Think about what you heard, what your interlocutor wanted to convey to you. This will give you confidence and help you control the situation in communication.
Laughter. Don't giggle. You're not at the circus. Giggling is a sign of uncertainty and instability. Appreciate good jokes: smile or laugh calmly.
Nodule disease. If you listen to your interlocutor and agree with him, you don’t need to continuously nod your head - you are not a “Chinese dummy”. You are a serious, confident person. A couple of head tilts in agreement are quite sufficient.
Secret and obvious. Being in any situation: in or with people, in the rays of the sun or in the dark, do not do anything for which you will be ashamed of yourself. Act in accordance with your principles, do not prevaricate, and she will reward you with the foundation on which self-confidence and high self-confidence will rest.
I don't know and I'm not afraid. If you want to be trusted, never be afraid to admit that you don't know something. “I have not yet encountered such a problem. Right now I don’t have an answer to this question.” It is impossible to know everything. Realize this and feel free to say what you don’t know. This will help you build your self-confidence even more.

Friends, everyone has absolutely everything they need to be confident, starting from today, from this moment. To do this, you do not need to read additional literature, make an appointment with a psychologist, or undergo training. Just decide to be a confident person, flip the switch and turn on your new personality. Good luck!

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If you're naturally shy and can't boost your self-confidence, why not fake it? Many people seem to be overconfident and full of confidence when in reality they are insecure and have low self-esteem. The thing is, people don't know what's in your head and they judge you by your behavior. Luckily, you won't be able to show your nervousness from now on, because here's a list simple ways appear confident even if you're not. How to look confident?

1. Speak slowly.

First of all, you must know exactly what you will be talking about. A confident speaker prepares his speech in advance and speaks slowly so that others can better understand them. Some of us speak quickly because we want to finish our speech as quickly as possible or we are afraid of being interrupted. Develop the habit of thinking long before speaking. This is a quick way to fake confidence and look more professional.

2. Keep talking.

Never stop speaking even if someone interrupts and speaks for you. Speak loudly and confidently to show that you are ignoring them. Don't shout back. They will do the same and make your situation even worse. Respect yourself and don't let anyone interrupt you, but if this happens, don't lose control of the situation. You don't want to argue, so don't react to people's provocations.

3. Stand on one leg.

Shift your weight to one leg to show everyone your confidence. This posture means that you are not preparing to defend yourself. However, this does not show your weakness. This way you look like a person who feels no tension and they don't need any protection at all. “There is no one who can try to hurt me.” is what you tell people when you stand on one leg.

4. Move correctly.

To look confident, you need to pay attention to how you move. Nervous people always make sudden and fast movements, so try to move slowly but purposefully successfully with fake confidence. Avoid unnecessary gestures. If you don't know where to put your hands, keep them together near your navel like the most professional speaker.

5. Eye contact.

The mistake they make nervous people during a conversation, when they look at the interlocutor. There is a big difference between staring and making eye contact. Confident people make short eye contacts and can easily look around when speaking. Making eye contact can help you appear confident.

6. Dress confidently.

People tend to wear clothing based on their level of self-esteem. If you want to present yourself as a confident person, wear something bright. Insecure and shy people will never wear bright clothes - they prefer to remain invisible in the crowd. So try not to wear dark colors. An interesting slogan on a T-shirt can also help you appear more confident.

7. Improve facial impression.

Do you sometimes wonder why people don't talk to you? It may be that you are expressing distress or other negative feelings. Once you improve your facial impression, you will immediately notice the difference. Try to calm down and smile instead of frowning. It can be difficult when you're nervous, but try to focus on positive things and thoughts to appear more friendly and confident.

8. Tell funny stories.

If you find it difficult to talk to people without internal tension, your favorite, funny stories can help you cope with this task. Keep several stories ready so you can tell them when the time comes. This good way relax and feel more confident when talking to strangers.

No matter how hard we try, many of us fail to build confidence. Feigning confidence is effective method show others that you are successful man. Pay attention to your body language and your speaking skills. If you feel like something needs to change, do it.

Truly confident people believe in their abilities. If you don't have confidence in yourself, then why should anyone do it? To develop this quality, read these 15 things confident people never do.

1. Don't look for excuses

Confident people take full responsibility for what they think and do. They don't blame bad traffic for being late for work; They were the ones who were late. Do not justify their short visits with the words “I don’t have time” or “I’m not good enough for something.” These people value their time and try to be better until they achieve it.

2. Not afraid to do anything

Such people cannot allow fear to rule their lives. They understand that in most cases, what they are afraid of is the very thing they need to do to become the person they want.

3. Don’t live only in your comfort zone

Confident people try to avoid their comfort zone because they know that this is where dreams die. They actively seek to experience discomfort, because this is the only way to achieve prosperity.

4. Don’t put things off until tomorrow

Self-confidence means knowing that a good plan executed today is much better than a great plan put off until the next day. Confident people do not wait for the “right time” or the “right circumstances” because they know that this desire is based on a fear of change. They take action here and today because only then can progress be made.

5. Don't obsess over what others think.

Confident people don't dwell on negativity. They care about the well-being of others and strive to make the world a better place, rather than dwelling on other people's negative opinions, which they cannot change anyway. These people know that their true friends will accept them for who they are. They don't care about everyone else.

6. Don't judge others

They don't like unnecessary drama and don't feel the need to insult friends behind their backs, engage in co-worker gossip, or lash out at people who have a different opinion. They feel so comfortable with who they are that they don't feel the need to look at other people.

7. Don't let lack of resources stop them.

The peculiarity of these people is that they can take advantage of any resources that are available, regardless of their quantity. The main thing is to know that anything is possible if you are a creative person and don’t stop halfway. They do not suffer from failures, but try to find a way out of the situation.

8. Don't compare

People who are confident in their abilities do not compete with everyone around them. They are not in competition with any other person except the person they were yesterday. They understand that each person's story is unique, and making comparisons is absurd, to say the least.

9. They don't try to be nice to everyone.

Confident people do not try to please every person they meet in life. They understand that all people cannot be satisfied, but that is how life works. You need to focus on the quality of your relationships, because a large number of partners will not make you happier.

10. Don't need encouragement

Such people do not need to maintain self-confidence artificially, because they understand that life is unfair, and not everything always happens the way they want. They cannot control every event that happens in their lives, but focus on their own strengths to respond to them in a positive way.

11. Don’t avoid the bitter truths of life

Confident people try to deal with the root cause of a problem before it grows to enormous proportions. They know that if problems are not solved, they will only increase every day. Therefore, today they prefer to talk with their partner about troubles than to try to hide the truth and take risks.

12. Don't give up because of difficulties

Confident people get up and move on every time they fall. They understand that failure is an integral part of progress and growth, so they try to find reasons to find out why this approach is not working. And after changing their plan they try again.

13. Don't need permission to act

They take action without thinking. “If not me, then who?” - this is exactly what such people tell themselves every day.

14. Don’t stop because you don’t have enough “tools”

Confidence is the ability to think beyond just Plan A. They use every possible weapon at their disposal, tirelessly testing whether their actions are effective until they determine a strategy that will bring maximum results with minimal time and effort.

15. They don’t accept everything they read on the Internet as truth in which they need to blindly believe.

Confident people do not perceive all articles on the Internet as truth that does not require proof, just because some author said so. They evaluate all information from their own point of view and maintain a healthy skepticism when using any material that is relevant to life, and forget about others. These people understand that an article like this is a fun and interesting way to exercise their mind. But the only person with the power to decide whether you are confident or not is you.

Are you confident? Perhaps some may say “yes,” but most, like me, will answer in the negative. Becky Blalock, head of Advisory Capital LLC, has written a book with which any of us can become more self-confident. We bring to your attention the key tips from this book.

A few words before we begin. Leadership and confidence are abilities we are born with. Therefore, self-doubt and modesty are just a condition that we impose on ourselves, and here’s how to get rid of it.

Keep your thoughts under control

The average person has approximately 65,000 thoughts every day, and 85% of them are negative. Most of these thoughts are fears and doubts, and that's okay. Blalock says it's a relic passed down to us from our ancestors. If we extend our hand over the fire, our brain will give a pain signal so that we do not think of doing it again. A defense mechanism that allows us to survive.

But this defense mechanism sometimes works against us. Try to maintain a balance between positive and negative thoughts. Here's what you need to understand: thoughts are just thoughts, they don't have to reflect reality.

Start from the end

This advice is very relevant to me as someone graduating from university. Questions about what I'm going to do next and where I'm going to work lead me to a dead end, but it doesn't have to be that way.

Knowing what you want is the key to success. Everything else should lead you to this.

Start the day with gratitude

"Think about the fact that of the 7 billion people on Earth, many don't have the same opportunities that you have," Blalock says. Therefore, when you wake up in the morning, think about the things for which you can be grateful to life and the people around you. If you start with this, then the entire next day will pass in a positive atmosphere.

Get out every day

An interesting fact about the comfort zone: if we try every day to take a step out of it, it will expand. If not, it dries up, just like our life. Being trapped in your comfort zone is not a pleasant experience, so do whatever it takes to get out of it.

We've all had experiences where we've done something that scared us and turned us off, but it actually turned out to be not so bad. Here's an example Becky gives in his book:

Once I was visiting a military base and was on a parachute tower from which they make training jumps. I decided to try, but when all my uniform was already fastened on, I realized that I couldn’t do it, turned to the military and said that I wouldn’t jump, since I had a small child at home. One of the soldiers simply kicked me off the tower and kicked me. When I landed, I realized that I was grateful to him.

There are not always people nearby who can push us out of our comfort zone, so we need to learn to do it ourselves.

Remember that dogs don't chase parked cars.

No matter what you do, there will always be people who do not understand you, who judge you and insult you. Of course, if people close to you say this, then you should listen and think about it, but don’t give up everything just because of other people’s conversations and criticism. People don't like change, and if you change, it hurts them.

Be prepared for falls

A person's strength is tested in his actions after defeat. Once we get back up from failure, we understand what caused it, what didn't work, and we can try again. The more attempts you make, the greater the chance you will succeed.

Find a mentor

Whatever type of activity you are involved in, there are people who have already achieved success in it and can help you with advice or become role models. Find such people and learn everything you can from them.

Choose your companions wisely

Your horizon, Blalock says, is the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Therefore, be careful in choosing your friends. Make sure you spend time with people who inspire and motivate you to reach higher.

Do your homework

In almost any situation, preparation helps you become more confident. Do you have to give a speech in front of a lot of people tomorrow? Say it to yourself several times. Record it on a tape recorder and listen. Meeting new people at work? Find them and their organizations online, look at their profiles. If you are prepared, then you are much more confident. The Internet makes this incredibly easy.

Relax and don't forget about sports

Remember that we are biological organisms, and sleep, nutrition and exercise help us keep ourselves in good health. And therefore, they help you to be more confident in yourself. Find a free half hour three times a week and add sports to your life. It’s strange that sport often comes last on the list of priorities.

Breathe!

This tip is the simplest. When breathing, oxygen enters the body. The brain is enriched with oxygen, making us more alert. There is also a hidden trick in this advice: by controlling our breathing, we understand that we can control our body, which means we become more confident in our abilities.

Be prepared to look confident from the outside

You may be terribly worried and afraid of something. But only within yourself. On the outside, you should exude confidence. If you understand that you can’t get rid of fear, try not to show it to people around you.

Ask for help

Don't assume people know what you want. Let them know your wishes and intentions. Once you ask someone for help, you will be surprised how many people there are who truly love helping others. Of course, this is because they are flattered to be asked for advice, but who cares?

Even if someone says no, you can always ask someone else. However, in my experience, this happens very rarely.

Do you have any ways to overcome self-doubt? I can’t think of anything else other than the advice “Imagine the audience in their underwear.”